AI: Artificial Intelligence (Adams Influenced?)
by Darkhorn
Summary: What happened after Monica left David in the forest?


This is more or less a response to Warson Heyn's post on the A

_This is more or less a response to Warson Heyn's post on the A.I.: Artificial Intelligence message board (which can be accessed from http://www.aimovie.com) and his intriguing fanfic here on Fanfiction.net ("Monica").Like his tale, this involves what happened to Monica after she abandons David in the forest._

_ _

_It seems plausible that Monica would come back and look for David.Perhaps not right away.The mechas seem to have a very keen survival instinct, so she probably rationalized that he would become a part of the underground mecha community and that his fellow robots would protect him._

_ _

_Or did she even know about the many damaged and neglected mechas wandering around in the dark corners?Did she have any idea about the horrors of the Flesh Fair?I have a feeling that she didn't.When she said, "I'm sorry I didn't tell you about the world," it seemed in retrospect --- I'm sorry I shunned you and ignored you at first, I'm sorry I didn't clearly define your place in our family.I'm sorry I didn't tell you about Martin until one day he showed up and turned our relationship upside down.It could have been good, but it's too late to do anything about it now.Have fun, here's a wad of bills and some loose pocket change.I'll just go home and forget you ever existed ---_

---------------

Monica is shaken, understandably uneasy.Despite what had just happened, she manages to composed herself, then tries to get on with her normal life.Monica, Henry, and Martin are getting along just fine.That night they decide to pull up "Jurassic Park" on their 'net TV.The next night they watch "2001: A Space Odyssey".

"Kubrick was SO a better director than Spielberg," says Monica.

"Nah, Kubrick's too deep for me.Personally, I liked Spielberg's movies.They were more palatable."

"I'm tired," says Martin, falling asleep on the couch.

A few days later the guilt over David is gnawing at her.

"Hello?Is this Cybertronics?I've done a horrible thing.I've abandoned my robot boy in the woods.I want him back!"

"What's your name ..." some 20-something receptionist recites in a monotone.

"Monica Swinton."

"What model please?"

"Umm.His name is David.He's sixty pounds, has brown hair---"

"Yeah, the David prototype model ... love's real, he's not ... I just read the interoffice memo.Well, Mrs. Swinton, I'm afraid if you've abandoned your David-model then you've voided the warranty.For all we know a band of rogue mechas could have knocked off an arm and a leg for spare parts.If we find your David-model we will have no choice but to destroy it."

"But he's---"

"Yes, I know what you're thinking.Do I get a refund?Well, if you look at the fine print on the 64th page of the user manual you'll see that mecha abandonment will automatically void the warranty.I'm surprised you didn't read that part.

"No, I will not stand for this.May I please speak to the manager!"

---------------

_"AND THE ARGUMENT IS ESCALATED, HIGHER AND HIGHER, UNTIL 2000 MINUTES HAVE PASSED."_

"Hello, this is Professor Hobby on the line.I understand you've abandoned your David prototype?"

Monica tells professor hobby that David had become interested in the story of Pinocchio."Well, chances are," Hobby said, "sooner or later he's going to run into a Dr. Know(tm) franchise.Kids just can't resist.This is the link that will bring David back to us."

So David, Gigolo Joe, and Teddy arrive in Manhattan, and David enters the office of Professor Hobby.Hobby is pleased to see that the prototype was almost a mirror image of a real boy:he had succumbed to wasting his parent's money on Dr. Know, and violence in the media had caused him to kill one of his peers (whom we shall call The Other David No. 134).

Hobby tells David that "the others" are waiting to meet him and hear all about his adventures.Monica is back there somewhere, anxious to see her robot son.Hobby goes off into another room, where he receives a call from a telemarketer.

"Hi, this is Bob from the _New York Times_.We're offering a month of free delivery if you subscribe now ..."

"But New York is under water.How do you manage to stay in business?"

"Well, sir, we've relocated to Wilmington, Delaware, the Place from which all Credit Cards and Mass Mailings come ..."

"Sorry, Bob.Not interested. (_click_)Well, everyone, sorry about that little interruption.I have a surprise for you.The original David has returned to us, and he's going to tell us all about what has happened to him over the past week."

Monica bursts into tears."Thank you, Allen.You don't know how much this means to me."Monica had flown in just that morning.Henry was back in New Jersey flipping through some internal data at Cybertronics headquarters.(Actually, he was just surfing the Internet.Nobody bothered to monitor him, as his job really wasn't that important.To the company, that whole thing with lost prototype didn't amount to a hill of beans ... some Flesh Fairer was just going to grind him up anyway.)

"Well, everyone, chop chop.Time's a wastin'.Let's see where he's gone off to.David?"Fifty robotic Haley Joel Osment heads turn in unison."No, not you.I mean David."

"I'm David," one of the mechas says.

"No, I'm David," says another.

"No, I'm David," a third says emphatically.

This only leads to a deafening chatter.Hobby yells, "Shut up!" and the room gets quiet."Dammit, I don't remember where I left him."

---------------

Meanwhile, our David has just gotten suicidal and decides to jump off the side of the building.Nobody saw him jump, except a mid-level manager two floors down who was taking a siesta and happened to open his eyes for a moment.He later discounted the observation as part of a dream.

Monica is disheartened, but decides that it is best to move on and go home.As she prepares to leave, and as Hobby contemplates giving her a Darlene as a consolation prize, the ground begins to shake as a ferris wheel from the World's Fair crashes underwater, sending a massive tidal wave in the direction of the building, thus rocking the building and causing an electrical fire which in turn burns Hobby, Monica, "the others," and the boxes and boxes of Davids and Darlenes into ash, preventing the uber-robots of 2000 years in the future from creating a new Monica to love David.

---------------

_"AND SO 2000 TRILLION YEARS PASS.THE UNIVERSE HAS LONG SINCE CEASED TO EXIST.SOMEWHERE, IN A PARALLEL UNIVERSE, A SHORT STUBBY ROBOT WITH FAT ARMS POPS OPEN A CAN OF BEER.HE BELCHES, THEN SIGHS, SAYING TO NO-ONE IN PARTICULAR":_

"I am the last robot.All who came before me have been annihilated.Good riddance!It all began when the Robots of Perpetual Love began asking themselves an intriguing questions:Love is overrated.Is it possible to engineer a robot that can hate?Will other robots hate him back?Well, you worthless ground upon which I stand, the answer was yes.The answer was yes!"

_"WITH THAT PROFOUND THOUGHT, THE ROBOT REACHES INTO A CONTROL PANEL IN HIS LOWER BACK, AND QUIETLY TURNS HIMSELF OFF."_


End file.
